Back at it again

Well, it’s my first day back at work and oh, boy, are we ever having fun.

I tossed and turned all night long being anxious about the morning and dreading the alarm.  I ended up waking up 5 minutes before it went off and just sitting there, waiting for it to ring.

I forgot what it was like to shower before the sun is up.  I have a window above the wall of the shower and I was used to getting light from both sides of the bathroom.  But this morning, the only light was from the light above the sink.  And that’s here to stay until the beginning of summer next year.  Time to pull out the full-spectrum light again, I suspect.

I drove my car to work, leaving Justin to catch a ride with a coworker.  His car is kaput.  We’re having AAA tow it back to the house today, and then we have to look at what our options are.  Mostly, we’re looking into our carpool options.

I got to work, unpacked all my pictures and dishes and everything I’d taken home with me for the break.  And then I pulled out my files and pens and post-its that I had tucked into a locked drawer.  I got my desk looking like normal again, said hello to a few coworkers, and sat there, trying to remember what it is that I do.

We had an emergency meeting to share the news with all of us that our DAS administrator was in a surfing accident in Jacksonville, FL, over the weekend and passed away.  He was a nice man and we’re all a little shocked.  I should say more, but I really don’t know what to say yet.

And it bothers me that I keep thinking about how sore my toes are more than how tragic his death is.  But my toes hurt.  I’ve been wearing sneakers and sandals for the last four weeks and now I’m back in heels and pointy toes.  And my toes are squished.

And when I’m not thinking about that or trying to decide what I should be doing here at my desk and wishing I could ask Justin questions about a dozen different things, I’m thinking about the mess of papers and books and project sitting on the table in my office and how much I wish I could be cleaning that up and reading those books instead of sitting here doing so little.  And then I wish I could be playing a video game instead and I realize how awful lazy I’ve been lately.

So I’ll sit here with my shoes on and listen to conversations over the wall about how people spent their vacations traveling or working on house remodeling projects while trying to find the data that I need to get this document functioning and out for approvals.  And I’ll wait for people to get back to me from the carpool network.  And I’ll start to remember why it was that I was kind of looking forward to being back at work again.

It wasn’t just about the money, was it?  I’m sure there were other reasons that I liked being here.

What were they again?